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Stately Acres

Stately Acres is a seasonal gated mountain community near the ski lodge outside Radford, Virginia, where the pinball-loving guard Douglas Douglas is stranded at his post and where the Lawson family keeps a cabin.
Type Location (gated community)
Aliases gated community
Region Mountains near the Alpine Lodge, outside Radford
First appearance Radford Horror 07
Inhabitants Douglas Douglas (guard); the Lawson family (seasonal)

Description

The entrance has a wrought-iron sign, a locked road gate and a call box; the surrounding fence is just wire. A portable guard shack sits at the gate, along with a community tool shed. Cabins stand on gravel turnoffs, and the only cameras are on the guard shack. It is used seasonally (Radford Horror 07). The gate is about two miles from the spot where the team earlier saw people emerging from the woods after what looked like a business meeting (Radford Horror 07).

The sign over the gate suggests a holding or property-management company runs the community. Douglas says he cannot leave his post, and the table likens his job to a company-store arrangement (Radford Horror 07).

Notable places within

The guard shack

A portable building with a bed against one wall; the rest of the space is packed with about 30 years of vintage pinball machines, including Space Invaders, Indiana Jones, Universal Monsters Mummy and Dracula, an off-brand Aliens and a Bozo clown machine misprinted "3056" (Radford Horror 07).

The Lawson cabin

See Lawson cabin. A stone-and-timber cabin with a big Lawson sign at the turnoff, a rustic backyard, and weak locks.

History of events there

On the midday after the Whateley house raid, the team drives to the gate hunting Dean Lawson. Kurt uses the call box; a voice says the Lawsons use the place in summer and gives a phone number. The guard, whom Andre names Douglas Douglas on the spot, offers to show his pinball collection and buzzes the team in (Radford Horror 07).

  • Douglas's situation. He cannot leave his post or he is fired, must buy food from the company, gets supply drops every three months, and gets one unpaid month off per three. Andrew urges him to "investigate your rights," and later writes the Department of Labor's numbers for him. Kurt suggests a sign for a pinball hall in town; Douglas draws one on printer paper and asks the team to hang it alongside the missing-dog posters.
  • Fashion advice. He tells Andrew, "You look the most like a Fed of anyone I've ever seen," and gives him tie advice.
  • The shovel lead. Douglas volunteers that Dean was up recently and has been seen several times carrying a shovel to the family cabin. "Burying bodies? I don't know... He kicked one of my cats." He allows the team to look around as long as he is not fired.
  • The dig. While Andrew keeps Douglas talking about aliens and the poster, the Biz steals a fiberglass-handled shovel from the community tool shed (Act Under Pressure, 11 with Andrew's Help Out). Digging at the cabin turns up several Ziploc bags holding about $40,000 in hundred-dollar bills and a small tin key. Inside the cabin a locked Samsonite briefcase under a loose floorboard holds four parcels of slightly cut South American heroin (see Dean Lawson's heroin and cash).
  • Departure. Douglas begs for toilet paper; Kurt fetches some from the trunk. The team returns the toilet paper, collects the sign, and Douglas shakes Kurt's hand for twenty seconds (Radford Horror 07).

Douglas reappears in 1993 as the owner of the Douglas Pinball Emporium, whose lawsuit-funded opening is traced back to the team's earlier case (Radford Horrors 03).

Trivia

  • Andre named the guard on the spot after the table suggested joke names such as Clyde Behringer and "George number five". Andre explained "Douglas. Like the writer," then clarified that he meant Frederick Douglass, and Ezra remarked that the guard was "about to become the most important character" (Radford Horror 07).
  • Zack, as Huell, whispers "Serial killer" to Andrew about Douglas, a gag that goes nowhere (Radford Horror 07).

Appearances