Triangular craft¶
The triangular craft is a crashed triangular aircraft embedded in the site of a destroyed farmhouse in Oryol Oblast, Russia, which Boris Yeltsin asked the Biz to examine.
| Type | Item (crashed craft) |
| Aliases | UFO; "unusual aircraft crash" |
| Location | Oryol crash site, Russia |
| Status | Partly excavated under a tent and guarded by the Russian military |
| First appearance | Radford Horrors 03 |
Description¶
The craft is a triangular object a little smaller than the space shuttle. It annihilated a farmhouse on landing and is embedded in the ground where the house stood. It is badly wrecked, but the triangular shape is still recognizable. It is partly excavated, visible through a clear double-walled plastic curtain under high-intensity arc lamps, inside a tent room (Radford Horrors 04).
Properties¶
Andre describes no controls or markings on the craft itself. What the Biz saw inside the tent was its occupant: the crash survivor, a bisected non-human being kept alive in a hospital bed and hooked by tubes to a Russian soldier. See that page for the survivor's behavior and what it told Yeltsin (Radford Horrors 04).
History¶
In Radford Horrors 03, Boris Yeltsin, calling the Biz "Richard," met him on the stairs of the Hotel Metropol in the rain and told him, lowering his voice, that there had been "an unusual aircraft crash in Oryol Oblast" and that he wanted the Biz to take a look at it with him. Dante joked, "Somewhere Andrew is tingling." The convoy was ambushed on the way by Chechen and Russian attackers, and the craft was not reached in this episode (Radford Horrors 03). See convoy ambushers.
In Radford Horrors 04, the cold open showed the buried craft under work lights. After a night in a hospital room, the Biz was taken at dawn to see the wounded president, then flown by helicopter with Yeltsin's hospital bed to a field near the site. After roughly forty minutes waiting on a folding chair in a tent while the Russians planned how to move the bed in without uncleared eyes seeing, he helped push the bed into the craft room. Yeltsin had the doctors wake the survivor with a syringe. Asked in Russian and then English why it was there, it said "Survey," and answered that its people were "not aliens, the opposite of aliens," adding "Servitors... need resources" before losing consciousness. In private, the Biz told Yeltsin that these were not the same aliens the Biz had dealt with, that he had seen resources go through portals before but that it "presented differently," and that he had not heard of servitors (Radford Horrors 04). See servitors and Dick "The Biz" Baxter.
What remains unknown
The episodes do not say what the craft is made of, how it crashed, or what became of it after the Biz's visit. Zack joked that the episode could have been titled "Opposite of Aliens."