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The Things in Appalachia, Episode 06

A "dead Bigfoot" on Frotter Comstock's land turns out to be an executed ex-military man in a stolen Chewbacca costume, and the team traces him from a dry cleaner to a motel dumpster.

Arc The Things in Appalachia
Episode 06
Setting Dahlonega, Georgia and Comstock's property near Auraria
In-fiction date October 1992; one day, morning to evening
Players present Andre (GM), Dante, Ezra, Zack, Rita
Previous Appalachia 05 (unrecorded)
Next Appalachia 07

Synopsis

The morning after the Biz's unseen night, Frotter Comstock reports a dead Bigfoot. It is a man in an expensive Chewbacca costume, shot in the back of the head, with fake footprint evidence nearby and signs that someone cleaned up afterwards. The team follows the costume to the photographer it was stolen from, to the dry cleaner it was stolen out of, and to the Motel and Suites, where the dead man's discarded belongings include a false-lined briefcase holding about $10,000. (Appalachia 06)

Plot

Breakfast

The recording begins in the middle of a recap of the unrecorded Appalachia 05: the Biz came in wearing slept-in clothes, the hotel door next to the team's was broken down, and he has a badly twisted ankle. At the continental breakfast, Frotter Comstock arrives with the sheriff, complaining that the agents would not come and shoot "that bear" for him. He reports a dead Bigfoot on his land and refuses to touch it for fear of disease. Kurt Larson tells the sheriff to make sure nobody interferes with it: "CIA standard procedure." (Appalachia 06)

The body in the copse

Frotter's outbuildings have been hastily wrapped in blue tarps, and a large streak of gore by one shack is introduced as "the bear incident". The body lies in a copse of trees at the base of the hill below. Andrew Howard's Investigate a Mystery (12) establishes that it is a man in a costume soaked in real blood, with a wound like a gangland execution he once saw in an Academy photograph. When Andrew announces that the man was "capped", the sheriff rebukes him: "Son, a man is dead." (Appalachia 06)

Kurt checks for body armor and finds none, which rules out his old unit, UTAW. Under the mask is a white man of 25 to 35 with a military haircut; every tag has been cut from his clothes and his pockets are empty. He has faded anchor and trident tattoos, and Kurt's Sharp roll (11) identifies the trident as a Navy SEAL emblem. The man was shot standing, from directly behind, and was not moved. A second roll (11) puts the weapon at roughly a .357 Magnum at point-blank range. (Appalachia 06)

The Biz's Investigate a Mystery (12) finds ATV tracks that stop near the body and continue down toward the freeway, a snapped plaster-of-Paris toe matching fake Bigfoot prints in the mud, and partial human prints. The molds themselves are gone: someone tidied up after the killing. Frotter whispers to Andrew that he will allow a search of the property if they leave the buildings alone, and gets an ambiguous wink. After a table debate about warrants, Kurt goes into a building anyway and finds Frotter trying to brew beer with marijuana in place of hops. (Appalachia 06)

Following the costume

McManley collects the body in his RV, later noting that the costume's bandolier had been removed and mud rubbed into the fur. At the Gold Bug newspaper, a pinched older woman identifies the Bigfoot photographer as Derek Edwards. By phone Derek says his pictures came from motion-sensor cameras, and that his own Chewbacca costume, bought for cash at a convention, was stolen from Apollo's dry cleaners eight months ago. (Appalachia 06)

Kurt calls the Spud Hut corporate auditor who has been tailing the team, and he buys them lunch at the Spud Hut. The counter savant recognises the dead man's photograph: he came in three times, 4, 9 and 25 days ago, paid cash, wore a holster, and arrived by ATV. Once he was there at the same time as a man in a business suit, though they did not speak. The auditor says the man is not on the plant's employee list. (Appalachia 06)

The scene photographs are developed in the hotel bathroom. The Biz volunteers, Andre passes Ezra private information, and the Biz emerges shaken and absent-minded. The photos and tattoos are faxed to the FBI from the police station. (Appalachia 06)

Apollo's and the Motel and Suites

At Apollo's, the owner admits the storage-room latch had been broken for months. He recognises the dead man as an out-of-town drifter who used to stand watching, sometimes talking on a walkie-talkie, and who was probably staying at the Motel and Suites. There, a weary clerk behind bulletproof glass confirms the man registered as "John Doe", paid cash, was collected once or twice by a helmeted man on an ATV, and had a female caller. His things were thrown out the day before. The clerk warns the agents not to open the green garbage bag. (Appalachia 06)

McManley sends three teenage interns to work the dumpster. Snakeskin cowboy boots identify the right bag, and Kurt's Investigate a Mystery (10) turns up a briefcase with a false lining, a slot for a high-caliber handgun and about $10,000 in bank-banded notes; a coil of animal hair in one boot and a walkie-talkie in the other; and plastic bags and duct tape. There is nothing identifying. Kurt notes the walkie-talkie's frequency and reads the man as a mercenary, not a spook, possibly sent to kill someone and double-crossed with his own gun. (Appalachia 06)

Where things stand

Kurt's working theory is that someone hired the former SEAL to fake Bigfoot, perhaps to keep people off Spud Hut property; that a real ape-man hybrid exists separately and the two are unrelated; and that there is also a bear. He wants the gore smear at Frotter's tested against the hybrid tissue. Asked to convey how bad the Biz's day is, Ezra declines. (Appalachia 06)

Cold open and framing

"We open on a slow zoom on the hotel." Caution tape surrounds the bushes outside the Smith Hotel while tired state police take prints and swabs. An officer emerges with a night-vision headset: "Bag it and tag it, the Secret Service fellows I want to take a look at that." Andre later confirms that the "thing" the Biz needs to retrieve relates to this scene. Ezra was taken aside twice for private information, so part of the Biz's story is off the record. See the show. (Appalachia 06)

Player characters

NPCs

Monsters

  • None on screen. The "Bigfoot" is a hoax; the ape-man is discussed.

Locations

Items

Revelations

  • The recent Bigfoot sightings were staged by a man in a stolen costume using plaster molds; he was then executed at point-blank range from behind.
  • A second person cleaned up the scene and left by ATV toward the freeway.
  • The dead man was probably a former Navy SEAL working as a hired hand: cash, no identification, a walkie-talkie, and a kit that could serve for disposing of a body.
  • Derek Edwards's newspaper photographs came from his own motion-sensor cameras and are not tied to the dead man.
  • He is not on the Spud Hut plant's employee list.

(Appalachia 06)

Open threads

  • Who hired the dead man and who shot him; the businessman at the Spud Hut, the helmeted ATV rider and the female caller.
  • The dead man's fingerprints and the FBI's answer to the faxes.
  • Whether the gore at Frotter's is hybrid tissue.
  • What happened to the Biz overnight, and what "the thing" is.
  • Spud Hut Corporate has not been visited, and the green bag stays closed.

(Appalachia 06)

Memorable quotes

Quote

"Now, the fact that he is dressed in a Chewbacca outfit is undeniably hilarious. That's extremely funny, but we have a responsibility here, as law enforcement officers, to take every death, including those in Chewbacca costumes, with the gravity that is deserved by the loss of a human life that is wearing a Chewbacca costume." Andre (as the sheriff)

Quote

"Sir, next time someone shows up with a dead Bigfoot, you should check if it's a man in a suit." Zack (as Huell), to Frotter

Quote

"Jesus Christ, boy. I'm gonna call in some people in NATO. I don't know. We're gonna get you a different job, son. You wait here, boy." Dante (as Kurt), to the counter savant

Quote

"You will be hearing from Langley." Dante (as Kurt), leaving the counter

Quote

"All right. If you see a green garbage bag back there, don't open the green garbage bag." Andre (as the motel clerk)

Quote

"I love this T-shirt." Rita (as Andrew)

(Appalachia 06)

Table notes

  • "Pig tips", the breakfast pork product explained as "mostly the front end".
  • Andrew is identified as a cop by every NPC, even in a Bigfoot T-shirt. See running gags.
  • Zack tested the savant with a coin flip; he called it correctly.
  • The table debated warrants at length, with a comparison to vampires needing an invitation.
  • Every roll in the session succeeded: Rita 12, Dante 11, 11 and 10, Ezra 12.
  • Andre first called the photographer "Derek Richter" and corrected it to Edwards. Rita misheard "Frotter" as "Frauder"; Andre confirmed the spelling.

(Appalachia 06)

Continuity

(Appalachia 06)